Just came back from work and just finish my shower. Felt extremely pressure from work just a few hours ago. Which is why I’m writing something again here.

 

Work load and difficulty just increased 5 folds. Everyday there is a pressure to accomplish or achieve a certain target or something. There are tones on my mind with no one to tell it to.

 

 During my shower I asked the Lord to give me a word or something for my current situation. Went online on Crosswalk for some devotional material and the verse for today is.

Proverbs 18:21 – The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

I have no idea to how that relates to my current situation.

 

Sat there for a while and asked myself what was I thinking or feeling about a month ago when I was about to get this job or when I first came in here.

My thoughts back then was:

1. I was really happy that I got a job now after my previous company terminated my contract.

2. Its a big company and I get to learn and experience new things.

3. Thought that in some way it will be better then my previous place.

4. Being able to leave home.

5. Get to find myself.

 

So far…

1. I’m still happy that I have a job. And being bonded for a year means I will have a job for at least a year unless I really suck at what I’m doing and they are forced to kick me out.

2. Yes it’s a much bigger company then my previous one and yes there is loads of difference. Be it in work, office politics, social, team work, culture and everything. I don’t know if I can manage. I also don’t know how many enemies I already have and yet to have.

3. If problems help shape a person. Then yes it is surely better then the previous place as there is certainly more problems.

4. Leaving home is fun for me at the moment. Loads of peace and quite. Having that said, it can be a struggle to fill my time with the right things and or beneficial things. Disciplining myself to do the things that are beneficial to my mind, body and spirit.

5. I guess this is the hardest part.

 

 

Am I a passion driven person? Will loving my job or the things I do help me do it better? Should I change my perspective of things? Why do I so quickly turn my eyes on the negative things? Why do I so often let my feelings and emotions take control over me?

 

I don’t know….. or I don’t want to know?  

I can't seem to login to Restaurant City since I came back from work on Friday. So bored. Went to Jusco and got myself a 1/100 Scale Non Grade Gundam 00. I've not touch a Gundam since end of primary school I think. It's so nice to be able to do what I've wanted for so long. Really wanted to buy one or two of these model kits to built when I was younger but it was just too expensive or my parents would probably nag me till my ears bleed back when I was at home. I'm slowly building kit and slowly taking my time to enjoy every second doing it. ^^

Here are some pics.. ^^

Front cover of the box

Unboxing the kit

What I've completed so far. Sorry my camera not focusing on the figure itself.

I guess I shoud not comment on the focus thing coz the camera on my phone does not have focus. XD

When to Honda showroom today (26 December 2008) to see the new Honda City. Owh, what a beauty.. It was love at first sight. I guess I've ran out of words to say about it and shall let the pictures do the talking.

Unlike the previous City which differentiated the i-DSI and VTEC models on the interior via different colours, the new City has an all-black interior across the variant range. I love black dashes, and although the plastics on the interior aren’t really soft touch as expected in a B-segment car, it has a slight rough texture to it so it doesn’t really look or feel cheap until you decide to rub around the dashboard. It’s definitely better than some of its competitors (you should know what I’m referring to) so it isn’t the worst in class.

The City 1.5 S base model’s interior lacks some nice features that the 1.5 E has, such as the compartment under the rear seats (which Honda constantly suggests you put your umbrella there), 60:40 split rear seats with a reclining feature, a rear armrest with cupholder, and it only has  fixed rear headrest. Both models have water repellent seats.

CD player slot is hidden behind flip-down panel, aux-in and USB port is located forward of gear shifter
The audio system also only has 4 speakers compared to the 1.5 E model’s 6 speakers but both variants get the new audio system which features nearly every connectivity method you’d possibly want - CD with MP3 and WMA support, USB input with iPod control support, and an aux input. The only thing you could want is Bluetooth audio streaming.

The meter panel is designed with a triple-gauge design and features a multi-information display that show various “vital statistics” of the car. The two most important features would be distance to empty, which shows you how many km more you can travel on the fuel remaining in your fuel tank, and real-time fuel consumption which shows you how many km you can go per liter of fuel according to your current driving style. You can use this meter to control your driving behavior as it shows you whether your current style is fuel economical or not in real time.

For more details you can head over to Paul Tan's blog to read it up.

Sometimes in life, it's the simple things that count the most.

-End-

Hmmm, I guess before I talk about my unhappy day maybe I should try to look at something to happy about. I just got my results and I've finally graduated with Honors. I guess it's nothing much but it could be something to be happy about.

Okay, now for the real stuff. The job that I'm currently doing is basically to offer support. I was kinda partially cheated because they told me it was nothing much to do with support. Now that I'm really in it I can see that it is nothing but support. Just the kind of job that I did not wanted. I can't deny that they are paying me a lot but I guess it's only reasonable as it is jobs like these that people do not want. This week is my third week of work and today I got my first problem so naturally I did not know what to do and how to solve it and had to ask my supervisor. Just all of a sudden the way he talked to me changed. The way he was talking to me felt like he was reluctant to teach me. It's my third week at work and this is my first problem. I've not asked him anything technical before this as I did not get a real hands on the system that I was suppose to be in charged of. I tried asking him a couple of time but he did acted like he did not hear me. We are sharing a same cubicle and he's just seated next to me but he pretended not to hear me. I had to ask him several times. His reply was, "I'm working on it". After he solved the problem he just asked me to notify the user that the problem has been solved.

I was then just being left there. I tried asking him about the cause and solution to that particular situation so that I could probably know what to do if I encounter the same problem. He acted busy and said he would explain to me later. Fair enough, I waited till about 3 something in the afternoon where he is actually free to start walking around to chat. When he walk by my seat I called and asked him again. And again he rejected and walked away with reluctance to teach me. So I was left there without a clue and idea on what happened and how to solve it.

I'm very unsure of why he is reacting that way towards me today. Maybe he was really busy, maybe he was having some problems on his own, maybe the job that I'm doing now was his job and that he is afraid that I might someday be better then him. Whatever it is, I really don't know. Maybe on a bigger picture it might seem like a really small issue in the working environment where there can be no real friends. But since he is my supervisor and the person I should turn to in case I have any question has already turned it's back on me and refused to pass down any knowledge to me I guess it's going to be difficult to work here already.

I guess I'll have to observe the situation a couple more weeks to actually confirm if he's really reluctant to pass down his knowledge to me because from what I know is he is still currently working on this system and he was the one who developed portions of this system. I guess I should still be looking for jobs. I don't plan to say in technical support anyway. Especially supporting a system that is being used in production line where I have to be on call 24/7. I guess such high pay really does come at a higher cost.

Lord, is this your plan for me to work here? If it is, confirm it by being with me at work and provide me your grace and strength to carry on. If not, please open a window for me O Lord.

---

My church elder sent this to my mail today. He has never sent me anything personal before but some how I guess these are the words that God wants to share with me or something. He doesn't know about my working condition or anything. He just sent this to me.

Psalm 132:4, 5
I will not give sleep to mine eyes, or slumber to mine eyelids, Until I find a place for the Lord, and habitation for the migh ty God of Jacob.

Rachel closed the door and hung her head. Three o'clock in the morning. She wondered whether the project was ever going to get done. All she wanted to do was collapse in bed, but first there was something she had to do. She dressed for bed, then took the Bible from her dresser and went to the kitchen table to read and to pray. In all of her adult life, she had never gone to sleep without first spending time with God. She was determined that nothing would ever come between her and this special time. It made no difference how tired she was, God came before sleep.

When days become hectic and full, it is easy to allow God to be pushed aside. We need to protect our time with the Lord and give it top priority. If we will keep the Lord close to us, he will sustain us and give us strength in tough times. Without Him, we can never hope to be our best.

Prayer:

Convict my heart with the determination to spend time with You. Let nothing come between us, Lord. When other things demand my time, remind me that I gave myself to You first. Amen.